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Michael Estrin's avatar

I saw a life coach for a bit. He was an actor who had dealt with his own gambling, sex, drug, and alcohol addictions. Most of my friends thought I was nuts to see someone who had been through so much shit, but my friend Norm, who has been through a lot of shit, was like, "that's who you want when the shit hits the fan... someone who has been lower than you."

I came to this life coach because I had been seen a regular therapist for my anxiety and for grief counseling. The therapy went well, but after a few months, probably because the insurance company said so, my therapist was like, "you've made progress, you are good, we are done here." I was like, "but I'm not writing, I haven't written in like a year." My therapist sighed and said that writer's block wasn't really something they dealt with or could treat, and I was like, "but I am a writer and whatever the fuck is going on in my head, it's a real-ass problem because I cannot work." We argued about whether or not writer's block is real, and at one point I gave her an example of a truck driver who couldn't get behind the wheel because of his feelings, and even though she said she would have to agree with me that my hypothetical trucker would need more therapy, so told me we were done. Again, I think that was the insurance company talking.

Anyway, I found the life coach through a friend of a friend. I paid him cash. We met in his office, which he rented from a shady criminal defense lawyer. I told him all the fears that were fucking me up. He encouraged me to journal about them, then bring in my journal so we could go over it together. It took about five weeks, but we pinpointed the problem. Then we spent another three weeks working on getting into a "joyful habit" that would get me writing again. Turns out that shit worked!

Stick with your witch, Alex! And thank you for writing this wonderful essay. I loved it!

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Davida's avatar

I recently did an online workshop where we were paired off in groups and a stranger watched me scream into a pillow for a long time. It was weird and also very cathartic. I'll probably never see her again. Thank you Beth for holding that space.

Alex this was a delight to read. I can relate so much. Although I read my cards from Francie RELIGIOUSLY!!! I laughed a lot and feel this sums up her work so eloquently. Also - I totally had family therapy when I was a kid and it was a strange strange time. It was group family therapy and all of the families there were extremely fucked up. The things I heard about in therapy disturbed me greatly as as 12 year old.

Lastly, fuck that bitch Anh.

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